A few blogs that I read have what they call “Wordless Wednesday” where they just post a bunch of pictures. I get annoyed by this. I enjoy pictures, but I prefer the words…so I’m instituting Wordy Wednesday on my blog! (Okay, not actually, as this is a quick post.)
I finished Sense and Sensibility the other day so I’ve moved onto my next book for the month, The Warmth of Other Suns: America’s Great Migration by Isabel Wilkerson. So far it’s a fascinating read. I found a little article on the book and the author that you might find interesting.
Growing up in the south in the 80’s racial divides were still very strong and it’s awful to think of how much worse people were treated not that long before. I know our country has come a long way, but we are not out of the woods yet. I also think of the various other ways we divide people—not just black and white, but by religion, by income, by GENDER, by sexual orientation.
I capitalized gender because I feel that is a great divide that still isn’t given enough attention. As women: We are treated as sex objects first and human beings second more often than not. We aren’t trusted to know what is best for our own bodies. We are paid less for the same work…we are still expected to do most of the childrearing and housework yet also work full time outside the home…for less pay. We are treated as if there is something wrong with us if we aren’t married with children. We rarely have leadership positions in companies or in the government…probably because we are considered to be less intelligent than men. Or perhaps because we are then looked down upon, if we don’t spend enough time with our families. I know we women have it better now that our mothers did, but I get worried sometimes that things will be taken away from us. Anytime you take something for granted or forget history you risk making mistakes and taking steps backwards.
That’s just some of the things I was thinking about…
Oh, and I finished my 10 mile run! Just around 2 hours 15 minutes…nice and slow. Now my ribs and hamstrings hurt from yesterday’s workout and my legs are ridiculously tired. Good times!
I couldn’t agree more on the gender divide, as this is one of my “soapbox” issues. I work in a male dominated field where women who acknowledge this (gender divide) are seen as “feminist” and people roll their eyes about it. I can’t adequately express how frustrating it is to work with men who (for the most part) have stay at home wives who have NO CLUE what it’s like to be a woman trying to balance my career, my family (thankfully no kids), the house, etc and I don’t even think they realize what I have to do when I leave here. To simplify it, “I’m sorry but I have noone to run my errands, cook my dinner, do my laundry, etc and you wonder why when I take a day off I spend it catching up on things” Thankfully, my b/f does most of the cooking on the weekdays (and is wuite good at it) and doesn’t expect traditional gender roles in our house, but in the end I still put a lot of pressure on myself to be the “ideal” woman (whatever that is).
I also feel like I have to work even harder to make sure that I maintain what other women have trailblazed for and it drives me CRAZY when I am sitting in a meeting (usually waiting for it to start) and another strong and intelligent woman will start a side conversation about shoes or reality TV or another traditionally female subject. GREAT way to set us back a generation! I make it a point to immediately distance myself from that conversation and usually join in whatever the men are talking about: thankfully I am pretty adept about talking sports or the stock market!
I appreciate your comment, but have to disagree with the last part–after all, why can’t we women talk about what we want? If you prefer to talk about sports or the stock market that’s great, if you are avoiding talking about shoes or TV because you are afraid men won’t respect you…well that’s just as bad–I don’t think women should have to pretend we are men–just that we are all humans.
Just to clarify, I don’t believe we have to pretend to be men but in a male dominated buttoned up corporate environment it is something that makes you stand out in a negative way. And it’s verbalized by the men … Comments about being at the sorority house, not work or full on rolling of eyes, as examples.
I engage in traditionally female subjects with my female colleagues but in my current workplace culture, I am very aware of male expectations. I am not a shell or a robot but if my behavior gets me taken more seriously by the people who are ultimately responsible for giving me the projects I can table the conversation about the latest sale at the mall. This is unfortunately pretty common in law and big business with younger female professionals.
And those things that the men are verbalizing–they feel completely comfortable bashing women in that way–that’s my point–the discrimination against women is so ingrained in our culture that it is not only acceptable, but considered something that you have to overcome in order to move up in your job. Not that you shouldn’t do what you feel is necessary in your job, because of course you should, but how can men talk about sports and that is okay, but heaven forbid women discuss something equally frivolous? Complete double standard, in my opinion.
Hannah, I completely agree with you; we should all just “be”. Be free to be ourselves and not feel pressure to pretend to be more like the other gender or vice versa. I hesitate to label myself a feminist because I don’t like to place myself on an extreme side, b/c then I’m just creating that divide all over again–why can’t we just all be equal human beings? For the most part, I think society has come a LONG way (women being treated more equally, civil rights, etc.), but sometimes I personally think we are so traumatized by our past, we tend to go overboard and be a little too PC and we risk not being ourselves sometimes. It’s just a fact: humans will never all completely agree on everything, but as long as we all agree to respect one another, I think we should be free to express our own opinions without fear. I admit I”m a pretty conservative person by nature, and often, I’ve been pressured by others who have differing opinions to keep my thoughts to myself; at first, I’ve satisfied their desires to not hear my opinions, but then after more thought, I became angry that I gave in to the pressure and actually allowed myself to be more sensitive to their feelings when in reality, they were intolerant of and insensitive to my own. Where’s the fairness in that?