Isn’t tax day the greatest? I finished mine yesterday, and, for a self employed musician who had to file “married, filing separately” trust me when I say it wasn’t a happy day. Such is life. But that’s behind us now (well, my bank account is still crying…) and this small business owner who can now have awesome affordable health insurance is looking to a brighter future!

I think I went over the hump of “busiest time of the spring” and am looking forward to a little more breathing room. I won’t really have any until mid-June but it’s nice to have a few crazy busy days behind me.

Even though I mostly worked over the weekend, I did manage to get outside and enjoy some of the nice weather!

Saturday I did some judging for the Music Federation. I got to hear a lot of great performances by some young children, and felt more inspired for my own teaching!

I got nervous when I saw the alto sax and brass listed, but it turned out that another judge took over my room for those kids.

Then I played a concert on Sunday that was actually quite a lot of fun. Mozart Requiem is always enjoyable and intense…it’s the very last thing that Mozart wrote and just amazing to think about his short life and what he accomplished in it. I haven’t done nearly as much…

Students, note this is how you play at the tip of the bow. See how I am not over the fingerboard? Also, watch the conductor. You just never know what is going to happen. It’s also important to try to get as many lines in your forehead as possible.

One thing I’m dreading is the upcoming hearing for my divorce, but I’m also looking forward to having it be DONE. This process has been long and challenging, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Things that are awesome: omelets with a little parmesan cheese in them. Way better than non-parmesan cheese omelets (which I ate for many many days of whole30).

I got quick cooking steel cut oats at Trader Joe’s today. I love steel cut oats but they take forever to cook, and frankly, they aren’t nearly as good reheated. I eat leftovers a fair amount for sure, but I don’t really want leftovers for breakfast (this made all the whole 30 breakfasts especially annoying).

Thanks for your comments on my last post (some on facebook.) I definitely agree with one who said that for her, not thinking about food and just eating when she’s hungry is the best bet, and just aim for qualities in her meals like balance, variety (lots of colors!) gratitude and moderation. I would love to be able to do that, and I do think that is my ultimate goal. It’s hard when your weight has always gone up or down to really figure out how much you ACTUALLY need to eat to maintain. And since I’m trying to lose right now, I’m not any closer to being able to do that. HA.

I do figure that continuing to work out regularly will help me out. And I really do enjoy lifting weights, and I really do enjoy walking and biking, and occasionally running (had a great run earlier this week) and always the feeling AFTER finishing a run.

My friend April shared a great link about running today. You might have seen it, but anyway: 75 Thoughts Every Runner Has While Out for a Run.  Number 7 and 43 are my favorites.

Well we are definitely at that part. Tornado sirens woke most of the city up this morning before 6 am and there is another storm coming through right now. April is the cruelest month, so I hear.

That didn’t stop me from hitting the gym this morning to wail on my pecs (or something like that!) and now I’ve got some work to do on my band music (in case you forgot, I’ve joined a band—I’m the violinist for a Trans-Siberian Orchestra Cover Band) for practice this Sunday. Bands practice, orchestras rehearse? And then teaching. I feel like this week has flown by…is that a sign of being busy or old?

That’s me, transcribing something I need to learn. I can learn by ear, I suppose, but it’s way easier once I see it written down. I’d been putting it off, but honestly it only took about 20 minutes to write that down. It’s amazing what you can do when you just sit down and do it!

People have been asking me my thoughts on Whole 30 after I finished. I have so many thoughts, but it’s hard to figure out what are real thoughts and what are reactions to being “able” to eat whatever I want again. Today I have had oatmeal with pb, yogurt, and bananas for breakfast, followed by a post gym meal of eggs, bacon, and a mix of purple cabbage/beet greens. It was delicious and totally hit the spot (both meals.) I’m definitely trying to stick with “healthy” eating, but eating Whole 30 for a month has made me question what that means…really I just want to eat without giving it that much thought, feel good about what I eat, and not spend too much money. That seems easy enough, right?

Tuesday night was a lot of fun. I met up with a friend from out of town at Mission Taco. I’d been there once before and had tacos, so this time I tried a burrito. It was delicious! I couldn’t believe there was a 30 minute wait for a table on a Tuesday night, but I guess that’s the price of trying a “trendy” restaurant. Fresh margs and mexican food…worth a 30 minute wait indeed. Whole 30? Not at all. Delicious and something my brain needed? Absolutely.

Though I’ve gotten pretty used to black coffee. Some people say, if you can’t drink your coffee black, maybe you don’t really like coffee. I say, I can drink coffee any way it’s served. Black is good, cream and sugar is good, coconut flavored coffee (this pictured cup) is good too.

Enough random thoughts. Hitting publish and off to work/practice!

Apparently I only blog on Mondays…

I have a really good excuse this time. My sister Leslie was visiting and we were busy doing all kinds of fun stuff (and working, well I was working…but we got to spend a good amount of time together having fun!)

We made it to the Art Museum, (this was something she hadn’t seen!) and even got free tickets to the special exhibition (free on Fridays, though you have to get a timed ticket). We got lucky and only had a 25 minute wait so that gave us time to look at some other art.

Leslie was attempting to show the proper form for looking at art but she realized afterwards that she was supposed to have her arms crossed BEHIND her as to not risk touching the art or getting too close. FAIL.

Found this cake in the Central West End near Pi Pizza where we had dinner. It’s good to not be on the Whole 30 anymore and to be able to eat what I like. I’ll give more thoughts on that in a new blog post. Today is just about Cakes.

Shaw Nature Reserve. It was a cold morning for walking around, but we wanted to get out and about. I’m not sure what was wrong with my face in this picture, but I am sharing the picture anyway. I want to go back to the Reserve after spring is truly here: it was cold and dreary and not a whole lot of stuff to look at because it’s still basically winter here, but the fresh air was still good.

By this time our heart wasn’t in it anymore. But it was nice to have a day to wander around the Hill and enjoy some gelato outside after having been bundled up the previous day.

Just so you know.

Things I haven’t been doing lately: running. This bodes well for my weekend half marathon. I’ll mainly be walking. It was meant to be something I trained for, but life…in any case, the weather is finally warming up. There are two options: 1) I don’t actually really like running but only the idea of it or 2) I just don’t like running in the cold or on the treadmill. You pick. Either way, I’m going to have fun, enjoy the three hours it will take me (if we are lucky) and appreciate what I’ve done and been through since this time last year. If I’d known how lazy I would get, I wouldn’t have registered (got a great price registering early of course, so that’s good), but I did, and I’m doing it anyway. And I DO want to get back into running: I enjoyed being a runner for awhile, and it made me feel good, and I want that again. Between the Whole 30 diet and the cold and dealing with a bunch of personal issues training just wasn’t a priority this time around. I’m okay with that, or at least trying to be.

I feel pretty good about what my priorities have been lately though. I’ve been working hard, eating great food, hanging out with friends and family, getting to the gym, and getting some great long walks in, so life is going in the right direction.

And sleep petting the cat, evidently…

Spring is a busy time here in real life—before I know it another week has gone by!

Things I’ve done:

Seen the movie 12 Years a Slave (highly recommend!)

Watched Gil Shaham perform with the SLSO

Went to Jazz at the Bistro

Made a ton of meals involving meat, veggies, and not much else (Whole 30 day 29, baby! So close but yet so far…I’ve lost weight for sure, but I’m tired of being hungry and low energy all the time.)

Performed with my quartet at a Retirement Community called Friendship Village

Played a wedding and cocktail hour

Taught some students (just some, as others were on spring break)

Listened to the Trans-Siberian Orchestra music I need to memorize about a million times

Felt sorry for myself (oh that one isn’t a good thing, but it’s been happening…the good thing is that I’m realizing that a lot of things that I blamed myself for weren’t really my fault—and that I deserve nice things to happen to me—someday I’m going to write a post about this, but not right now…for now, it’s just the constant ups and downs, and knowing that things WILL get better, have gotten better, and that in the future I’m not going to be making the same mistakes.)

Worked out—getting stronger!

Took some long walks

Cleaned

Got lots of cake pictures!

How’s your Monday going? I’m still trying to recover from this stupid cold…I keep feeling like I’ve kicked it and then I feel lousy. *sigh*

I went over 9 months I think, without having a serious cold. I had a few “under the weather” days and a couple minor stomach bugs, but I’m well into day two (or three) of a nasty cold, and I feel pretty generally lousy all over. I turned today into a “sick day” (I was bummed to miss a really cool violin teaching workshop and quartet rehearsal, but I’m seriously weak and need to be surrounded by massive amounts of kleenex at all times…it’s just not a pretty sight.). Of course, tonight the show must go on, so three hours of Opera it will be. I’m also hoping to rally and attend Celebrate Fitness tomorrow morning, but that might be the sun outside making me entirely too optimistic. Fingers crossed though!

I’m taking some time on the couch here (imagine me with my laptop on my lap) working on a few teaching related things and just trying not to pass out from exhaustion. I might be being a little dramatic, but I’ll tell you: showering was difficult—I’d thought it might help clear out my head—and moving around at all just isn’t much fun. Woe is me, right?

My brain wants  all kinds of comfort foods, the sort of things I might eat when I’m sick. Mainly canned soup or cereal, neither of which I am “allowed” to have on my diet. Last night was a homemade chicken veggie soup which turned out surprisingly delicious, as best as my compromised taste buds can ascertain. Today I have had eggs for breakfast and that’s as far as I’ve gotten so far. I don’t have too much of an appetite anyway, though I’m sure I could murder a pint of ice cream…

(I ate about three bowls of that.)

I am in a slight panic  over my (ha, surprise) lack of training for the fairly upcoming Go Half Marathon. I plan to run nonetheless, and while I haven’t been running as much as I should be, I’ve been working out much more regularly, and I figure it’ll be cathartic nonetheless. I’m not going to worry about time at all, and just enjoy being out there. I still have a few more weeks and I’ll be able to get a few short and long runs (run/walks to be fair) in and I’ll be just fine. Dropping ten or more pounds will definitely help, and I just don’t care enough. I care about getting back in shape, I care about getting my work done, and I care about having fun running, but I don’t care about sticking to a training plan that I am just not able to fit into my life at this time. And the ice and snow we’ve gotten this winter has certainly been a deterrent. Either way I’m in, I’m doing it, and I’ll finish, and that will tell me that I am still here.

Quote from Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (p. 649 in my edition):

Luna: That’s right, Harry…come on, think of something happy…”

Harry: “Something happy?”

Luna: “We’re all still here. We’re still fighting. Come on, now…”

I often think of that quote. For me it’s not fighting as in violence,  but fighting as in just keeping going, keeping moving, keeping pushing through. When things seem hopeless or out of control, I just tell myself, I’m still here, I’m still fighting.

(And that makes me want to read Harry Potter all over again. My students are often surprised to see the entire series on my bookshelf, but I can tell you I’ve read them all several times. It’s been awhile though and it might be fun to reread them. Then again, my stack of books to read, both actual and on my kindle, is getting pretty big, so maybe I should read a few of those first before starting on any repeat reading projects. )