All posts by hannahviolin

I am a violinist. I also enjoy running, working out, reading, and hanging with my friends and cat.
Random thoughts

November Blahs

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It’s too soon to be overly excited for Christmas, isn’t it? I’m hosting my family this year and I’ve been doing the planning…I am trying to figure out what to cook/bake and YES I know it’s quite awhile away, the time will really fly. I have never regretted planning ahead.

I thought I’d pop in a write something more fun and lighthearted than yesterday’s diatribe. I think as I’ve gotten older I’m more serious (or boring, as my niece Athena would say) and I end up not sounding very fun on the blog. Maybe, at some point, I stopped being fun?

I’m sure that’s not entirely true. It’s also possible that I was never that fun, and I just faked it better. I am perhaps a more genuine person now. I do work too much, but so do we all, or at least, the other people that are at work with me do (last night..at work… I had a conversation with a few others colleagues about how we all work too much…yet, we take great pride in it, and look down on musicians who think working a few hours a day is hard). I don’t know: you hear all these things about how one shouldn’t be too busy or pride oneself on being busy, and that’s all fine and good, but as I repeatedly say, somebody has to do the work, and a lot of this stuff doesn’t pay that great, and I would personally rather work a little more (it takes time, but rarely is this back-breaking work) and do a few more things I enjoy and not stress over bills.

Speaking of bills, I didn’t get my monthly paycheck from one of my college jobs. I usually get paid at the end of the month, and I went to look online to see why I hadn’t gotten a direct deposit notification from my bank, and lo and behold, nothing. Well it turns out somebody made a mistake, and then they asked, are you okay just waiting until the end of this month to get the back pay or should I ask for a special check for you? I realized, nah, I can wait. That’s a good feeling, and to me, money represents security. Working a lot means security, and it also means self-worth. When I work, I feel good about my skills as a musician and teacher, and that makes me feel good about myself overall. It may not be how you operate, but my identity as a musician is so wrapped up in my personal identity, and the two are hard to separate.

It’s not that I don’t have a bunch of other things that I do. In fact, I find that the more I work, the more I am drawn to do more things. I have a bunch of hobbies, nothing crazy like rock-climbing (apparently all the 20 to 30 year olds are into rock-climbing these days), but when I list the things out, there are a lot. I had to write something the other day and I listed reading, cross-stitch, running, hiking, going to concerts, and baking. I should add also taking on volunteer positions with music associations, writing music reviews, almost organizing my music, playing with a very needy cat, writing this blog, decluttering (not a hobby exactly, but an ongoing project when you and especially your boyfriend have hoarding tendencies), and of course, practicing violin. Since writing the other week about how I hadn’t been practicing, I’ve been doing a little better. Etudes are often my go-to when I don’t feel like doing anything else. I think my love of practicing etudes really helps my sightreading!

Anyway, I’ve got some things to do other than be at the computer, so I’d better go. I’ll just leave you with a few cat pictures! Oh, and we finished the Handmaid’s Tale. I felt that seasons two and three were a bit more…well, season three seemed improbable. I don’t want to spoil anything for you. It was good, but seemed like, okay why and how is June still alive? Glad we watched it though!

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Practicing

No one likes to do the work

I have many students that hate practicing. Some do it anyway and others don’t. I have a few that enjoy practicing, and do it more because of that. To be honest, there isn’t a huge level of different in playing between those that enjoy practice and do it, and those that don’t enjoy it but do it anyway, but the ones that don’t practice much aren’t as good at playing the violin.

It really takes a daily commitment, especially  when you are younger or just starting. This isn’t to say that if you miss a day of practice you forget everything, but if you practice 3 times a week and somebody else practices 6 times a week, that second person will be significantly further along in a week, and more so in a month. I tell new students, as close to everyday, even 5 to 10 minutes a day is all you need to start. It gets hard though, and you say to yourself, well, why bother. I suppose it’s like flossing—doesn’t take long, but kind of annoying and easy to skip, right? And what’s one day?

Then as you get better at the violin, it takes more time. That 10 minutes should become 20, then 30, then so on. Soon you may find yourself taking longer lessons, and ultimately, if you want to really do this right, you should be practicing daily for an hour, 2, 3, or more. That’s when people really start talking about your “talent”, when you are getting up early to practice before school, or when you dedicate weeks of your summer to a music camp, or when you take your violin along on a family trip to practice.

I get students in college who think that they should get an A just for taking lessons. They don’t think that me asking them to practice 3 hours a week is reasonable. (Seriously, I probably have 3 college students total that actually accomplish this.) I was always taught that for every hour in class you should spend 3 out of it. Now, 3 hours a week isn’t actually enough, in my opinion, if you are a music major. Because you should be striving to actually be good on your instrument, and even if you aren’t planning to be a performer, surely you want to be good enough for your community orchestra? and that requires some work.

No one wants to do the work. They also don’t realize that it gets easier, that the more you practice the more fun violin can be, because you are better at it! And that you keep getting better. I find that to be the most interesting: I keep getting better. Maybe I don’t have the fast twitch muscles of my youth or the memorization skills, but I can turn a phrase and I can make my violin sing the way I want it to, and those skills are more valuable.

I’m mostly frustrated. I’ve never been good at getting my students to practice. I ask them to track it, I ask them about their practice, I ask them to plan it out, I give them ideas on how to do it, what to practice. I try charts, graphs, stickers, rewards, etc. I praise them when they have good weeks. I find that ultimately, some will practice, regardless, and others won’t. Getting ready for recitals or contests makes those that already practice more motivated, which is good, but it’s all marginal. So why am I having such a hard time changing people’s practice habits? I think that it’s because, ultimately, it’s up to them. Have I emphasized it enough? Sometimes, occasionally, maybe no. I do try, but it’s possible I’m bringing assumptions to the table.

In any case, whenever I run into bigger issues, I always try to figure out how to do better in the future. This semester I’ve had some issues with a few students that I hadn’t had before, so I’m trying to figure out how to do better. I think for my college students I will really set out a required plan, and tell them their grade each week will depend on it. I will also make sure that they understand what a lesson is, and that it is not an optional class. For new private students, I will continue to try to spell things out more clearly and make sure the parents know the expectations, that practice isn’t something you only do when you have time, that it is something you make time for or otherwise, why are you taking lessons? Remember, more practice actually makes music more fun, because it’s not fun to do things you are bad at.

Random thoughts

Sunday Night

I need another weekend day! One with nothing to do…then again, today was already almost one of those days. And it was amazing!

I slept in, did some cross-stitch (my new thing), read, and took a walk. We went to look at a black cat in another neighborhood that we had heard about that looked like it could be Miles. And we found it, and here’s the thing…will we even know if we find him? I didn’t think this cat was him, but Louie just didn’t even know. And I could be wrong. We got kind of yelled at by a rude neighbor—we were petting this stray cat in front of her house and she came out to ask what we were doing, which okay, fine, but then she was super rude and said, that cat belongs to someone across the street, which is where the woman who messaged me on nextdoor about the cat LIVES. Sigh. I don’t know why people who hate other people live in cities, honestly. If I came out of my house to yell at everybody who stopped in front of my house to do something (pet the neighbor’s cat, pick up their dog doo-doo, pick up litter, tie their shoe, etc) I guess I would be pretty cranky too, as that would be time consuming.

Nonetheless. I don’t know. And we didn’t feel comfortable at that point taking the cat in the car and going to see, but I think maybe we can always go back another time?  Part of me says, of course I’ll recognize my own cat, but honestly, it’s been over 6 months and we only had him for 10 months and he was tough to get to know. I don’t know.

This weekend I have done a fair amount of Christmas planning. I know it’s early, but since I’m hosting my family, and I know December can be really busy, I want to be on track. I don’t know what we are doing for Halloween or Thanksgiving yet, but I know what we are doing for Christmas, AND I went ahead and made photo cards over the weekend. Snapfish was having a big sale (they have them a lot, to be fair) and this way I got the cards I wanted at a steep discount (I wouldn’t have bought them otherwise, at least not with the paper I did). So I’m a little crazy, but it’s also almost November, and soon I won’t feel too ahead of things!

We’ve watched more of The Handmaid’s Tale. I don’t want to spoil anything for you but I’ll just say I’m finding it more unbelievable, plot wise, and things are actually easier to watch because of that. We are only starting Season 3 now. I’m also listening to various podcasts (lately into Ben Franklin’s World), reading some mystery novels, rereading the Outlander series, and working on my turkey cross-stitch. I haven’t run this week as much as I planned to, but this coming week I will be. I haven’t been doing much practicing this semester at all…I just haven’t been feeling motivated, and I think it’s probably okay to take a break. I certainly play practically every day and I often play scales with my students and tons of demonstration, so even without practicing I probably play 30 to 60 minutes a day, and plus gigs. I should be doing more though, I suppose, but I’m more interested in doing hobbies and reading right now and I’ll just relax a bit more I think. If I felt my playing wasn’t good I’d practice more, but I feel like right now I feel just fine! Don’t tell my students…(then again, I’ll tell them, you too can take a break after 36 years of playing! As long as you keep playing your scales slowly.)

If I weren’t a musician I could have a relaxing weekend every weekend. Yet, that thought doesn’t motivate me to change careers, so I guess I’ll stay where I am. I do appreciate my relaxing weekends though!

This week looks to be pretty decent. I have social plans on Wednesday (as well as a standing weekly lunch date with a friend)plus there’s Halloween, and I’m not teaching at home that day. My teaching schedule this week is pretty busy on Mondays, Fridays, and every other Thursday, but otherwise Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and every other Thursday are decent. I used to wish I had more morning activities, but now I wish I had more mornings free to play catch up! Be careful what you wish for because you may get it! (I could still use more Sunday morning church jobs, as I find them fun and easy, but I won’t be worried about it).

I realize this blog post isn’t very interesting. I should have had a better theme before writing..I guess mostly it was about Miles. Did we see him today and just not know? I feel weird about that, but like I said, I didn’t really think it WAS him. But it could have been, I don’t know. The cat seemed sweet and friendly.

Sigh.

I should also really start working on my pile of “to be read” books rather than just adding more of them. I will make it a goal for November to read at least one more serious (aka nonfiction) book from the pile. Well, after I finish my library books Winking smile

Random thoughts

Nearly Halloween

I have been busy in my free time! I started a cross stitch project for Thanksgiving and I realized it’s much more time consuming than I thought, and now I’m struggling to put in the hours needed to finish in time. I’m not sure if I will, but I am making the effort. I’m even cutting down on my reading. It’s fun, and that’s what matters.

My legs are healing, though slowly. I went on my first run since falling and I felt fine, although I was very aware of the ground and probably got a crick in my neck from looking down too much, ha!

This weekend is Louie’s birthday and we have a few things planned. I don’t have much work this weekend—honestly I should have turned down the wedding I’m playing yesterday in order to spend more time with Louie on his birthday, but he has work anyway, so I don’t feel bad about it…I just regret that I’m giving up what could have been a full day off. I find myself saying yes to all gigs I’m available for whether or not I actually need to do them…then again, it’s hard to decide you don’t need to do a gig for budget reasons when your pay is so variable and heavily seasonal. I just accepted another gig for December—I was shocked it fit into my schedule and since it did, I said yes. That’s my motto for the time between Thanksgiving and Christmas, if it fits it sits, or something like that. And then I said no to a Christmas Day job and a couple right after that because I have family coming, so I think I’m managing to balance okay. Did I mention Louie has work to do anyway and I might as well make the money?

The good thing is that Saturday looks rainy, and that’s the day I have work, and Sunday looks nice and that’s the day I don’t, so I think it is lucky! Today is bleary as well, and I guess the good thing is is that fall is finally here.

We’ve been watching the Handmaid’s Tale. I’d seen Season 1 awhile back but was hesitant to start Season 2. I realized there’s also a Season 3 now (do I really need to capitalize Season, probably not) which means we’ll have more to watch. I am not finding it quite as difficult as I was: there are a few more ridiculous things in this season that don’t make sense and bring you out of the story a bit more, but the other thing is that I’m not watching it worrying about what might happen, I am watching it thinking about how our country was FOUNDED on slavery and white men thinking they were superior and had dominion over everybody else, and that is the exact premise of this show, and it ALREADY HAPPENED. So instead of thinking, this could happen, I’m thinking, this DID happen and how dare anybody FORGET that and think that this is unique, only because what, a white woman is enslaved? We can be better than that.

I’ve got teaching now, so I’m going to run and hit publish. Friday is a busy day!

Random thoughts, Running

Running Fall

I had quite the day on Saturday! I was out for a run, and really enjoying it. The weather was cool but sunny, perfect for outdoor exertion, and I was feeling good—really pushing myself on speed because my legs were feeling refreshed. I was about a mile from home, when I found myself falling…I guess I tripped on the sidewalk somehow, and landed part on the sidewalk and part in the grass. As I was falling I was thinking about how I had to play two Hello Dolly shows that day and I think I was trying to save my hands and wrists from getting hurt.

I sat there for a bit, first deciding if I could get right back up (no) and then deciding how badly I’d hurt myself. I decided nothing was broken or sprained and just some scrapes (pretty bad on the left outside leg), and then I remembered I had my phone, so I was considering getting a ride share back home. Louie was at work all day, so I didn’t have any help available there. I even saw somebody and just sort of smiled and they kept going, and I was also feeling a bit embarrassed and wondering how long I could sit there, and how I was supposed to wipe up the blood (use my shirt?), and that’s when a nice man approached me to ask if I needed help. I would have been a little more apprehensive except he was also with his wife and he was taking great care to seem not frightening, and I ended up first getting some napkins from them to dab off some of the blood, and then getting a ride back home—first I said it was only 2 or 3 blocks away, partly because I wasn’t sure I wanted a ride with a stranger, but also because I wanted to be self-sufficient. It was about a mile away, which isn’t bad in the car of course, but would have been a long walk (I think I would have called an uber or something, and I figured, well that’s a stranger too). Anyway, I got back and tried to figure out how to clean myself up and get bandaged. It didn’t seem super gross at the time, but that night when I got home and needed to change everything out it grossed me out more—I had a lot of “road rash” on the left leg and…well, this is why I’m not a doctor! (for starters).

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As I was sitting there trying to figure out the best way to stand up I did take a picture of my legs. I see here that I was sitting in the grass by the sidewalk…

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I landed a little on my hand. This was a good injury for violin in that it didn’t affect my ability to play at all!

My legs still hurt a bit, but things are starting to scab over. I’m tired of having large bandages on, but that’s how things go. People say you never regret a run, but I kind of wish I’d just relaxed Saturday morning instead!

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In other news, we finished the Hello Dolly run. I also finished an easy cross stitch project—I found the black cloth a bit difficult to work with though. I’ve started on a more challenging, Thanksgiving themed one next. I ended up having about 3 hours to stitch yesterday due to a bunch of students being sick, and it was nice. I barely made a dent in the project though, which means that it will take a long time. That’s fine with me, no rush.

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I ended up finishing the back by folding in the cloth, sewing it together and adding a piece of felt. I’m turning into a weird super crafty person.

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Muriel likes sitting on the printer too I guess. Lately she hangs out quite a lot on top of the router in my living room (it’s warm and maybe she feels the waves, ha) but I liked this printer cat pose. (Yes, that’s a guitar next to the printer. We still have a fair amount of organizing and decluttering to do.)

Well, that’s it for now. I’ve got some errands to run before a fairly light day of teaching (well deserved light day, if you ask me). Tonight we are trying a new restaurant down the street called Taco Circus.

Random thoughts

I believe that Autumn is here!

Today is a bleary overcast day…it’s perfect! Unfortunately I’m stuck in the pit playing two shows today and can’t be inside looking out the window and appreciating it.

Yesterday was supposed to be a few things that it wasn’t. I did manage to get some good rest and “self-care” in and then had some stomach issues plaguing me the rest of the day. I took this morning off as well to make sure any lingering effects were gone, and I’m feeling pretty well back to normal. I’m sure you wanted to know that (then again, maybe you do!)

This weekend is incredibly busy as we finish off the second week of Hello Dolly. I’m glad that next week will have some earlier evenings and some breathing room…I’ve been managing to take some time for things that I enjoy, but I haven’t been able to spend much time with Louie or other friends, and that’s always something that gets pushed aside when work is really busy (as evenings and weekends are when many people are free to hang out). I also miss having a dinner where you cook something and then sit down and eat it off of a plate! Okay, I know, it’s only been about two weeks, and it’s been a fun show (I always wake up with tunes in my head) and I’m just saying…I’m a bit tired is all.

It’s not as if my schedule is totally free after this—as we head into prime season things are heating up. I don’t have any particularly noteworthy events happenings, but there’s opera, random concerts, more weddings, and then we get into the Christmas season. I also have various student events. You know, the usual. Running around, feeling a bit stressed, making it all work somehow. As one does. I know it’ll all work out and I like to think that with experience I get better at it, but I’m not always sure.

This isn’t a terribly interesting blog post, I know. Life is often just a series of mundane events, isn’t it? And if a blog reflects life, perhaps many of the blog entries would be mundane. Paying bills, cleaning, trying to stay organized (my music collection is always out of control, for instance), laundry, meal planning and cooking, exercising, returning emails, phone calls, preparing for the next event, invoicing students, etc. The list goes on and on!

Book wise I’ve been reading Deborah Crombie’s books. I’ve finished the Outlander Books but want to re-read them as well (and I’m hoping to start the TV show when I have a little more time, ha!). I have been watching Succession and I’m up to date on it, great show! Maybe it’s intended to make us all feel glad we don’t have the issues of the super-rich Winking smile . What are you reading and watching lately?