All posts by hannahviolin

I am a violinist. I also enjoy running, working out, reading, and hanging with my friends and cat.
Random thoughts

Adulting

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I read somewhere, somebody, complaining that millennials aren’t properly grown up, and that they even use the word “adult” as a verb, as in “I don’t want to adult.”

 

I’m not a millennial, I’m evidently Gen X (though I don’t recall that I was growing, I recall being Gen Y growing up, but now I’m Gen X and Gen Y has been renamed, so whatever) and…it gets old hearing people complain about young folks. I think every generation has worked hard, and for those of us entering the workplace post-9-11 it has been exceptionally hard. And yet constantly we are being told how lazy we are and how we just expect everything to be given to us, and all I see are people working really hard.

Most of the time when people make the “adulting” joke it’s about stuff like dealing with financial paperwork or insurance issues, perhaps renewing a driver’s license, or more complicated things like dealing with sick parents or a pet. Does anybody look forward to those things?

For me lately, it’s the sick pet thing…Chloe has been picking at her fur and skin again, and the other day had a horrible spot on her side. We put the cone back on for the foreseeable future, and took her to the vet. We aren’t certain yet the source of her issues, but I hope we can figure it out soon. She doesn’t pee in the litter boxes anymore, either…sigh. Having older cats is tough, but I hope we can figure out what’s going on.

This week has been going by in a blur. The fall has been busy, tiring, and pretty hard. Things are generally good, but just that there’s been so much to deal with!  Once Louie finishes school and starts working I think everything will be a little easier…at least his schedule might be easier, and that stress will be lifted.  I tend to pick up his stress and also have my own (keeping my schedule intact and keeping up to date on my students is a constant stress, not to mention performing, and then all the around the house stuff, plus dealing with a sick kitty.)

I’m happy that November is here. I’m not really into Halloween like some people are, and frankly I’m glad it’s over. It was starting to annoy me. (I know, I know…I sound old and cranky!) But Thanksgiving, well that’s a holiday I can get on board with. And this weekend I am traveling to a wedding in Phoenix and though it’s ALSO adding to my stress (early travel! how to pack to avoid checking a bag! playing violin at the wedding!) it should be a lot of fun and I can’t wait to see Leslie and my niece. Next weekend ALSO has a few fun activities planned, and then I’ll be visiting family for Thanksgiving, so this month is full of good stuff…hopefully. And not that the every day isn’t nice, but October felt like I was working all the time, and I’m looking forward to having some downtime this month. Fingers crossed!

I do feel like my blog posts this fall have been whiny…sorry to make you read it if that’s the case Winking smile (maybe they have always been like this?) I think I have to work harder on choosing what to stress over and what to let go…or I have too much on my plate?  It’s not that I’m too busy even, but just that it’s hard to feel like I’m on top of things. I guess having 38 students means there are always a few things to take care of. I really should do what people suggest and have a set time to deal with emails and non-time urgent things. Maybe I’ll start ONLY dealing with those to-do’s in the morning, and spend a certain amount of time, and then move on with my life. Music lessons are rarely a life-or-death situation, but sometimes rescheduling feels like it.

I sometimes read my old blog posts and think that I write worse today than I used to. I wonder if that’s true or if I am more critical of myself in the present day than in retrospect. Thoughts?

Cat

Who even knows what day it is

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I just spent at least 5 minutes thinking it was Tuesday. Sigh. Often it’s easy to know what day it is as I see the same folks on the same day each week (perils of a private violin teacher) but this week between opera rehearsals and some other students rescheduling for THEIR rehearsals…I’m seeing people on the wrong day which just really throws me off.

Today is evidently National Cat Day. Maybe that’s the day that matters!

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So, is anybody else already over Halloween? For me, this is not one of my favorite holidays. And I think that the number of Halloween activities seems to be out of hand. Halloween is a holiday for kids to go trick-or-treating. From door to door, house to house, not out of the back of somebody’s car…doesn’t Trunk of Treat just teach kids that people actually DO have candy in their cars and that yes, you should probably trust them when they say, hey, come here little boy, I have candy?

I’m told there is decoration and it’s all in good fun. But I’m pretty sure that’s what regular trick-or-treating is, except you walk further between the houses than you do for cars, and it’s just one night so you don’t have to worry about how much candy your kid gets all month long.

Maybe I’m old and crotchety. Or maybe I’m jealous that Thanksgiving hasn’t taken over like Halloween and Christmas have. (And Fourth of July. Don’t get me started on how the fireworks were nearly a week late this year in our neighborhood which majorly threw off plans and ultimately led to an incredibly anticlimactic party.) How about we start celebrating Trunksgiving, where you go from car to car eating Thanksgiving food that people have prepared. Mmm…turkey here, stuffing over there, gravy off the back of that truck, cranberry sauce from that little Fiat.

Which reminds me. I used to have an adult student who came to my house in Cleveland, and one time he came up for his lesson and told me that after parking, a man approached him and asked if he wanted to buy some meat. The man evidently had random packages of meat in his trunk that he was trying to unload. Or maybe my student misunderstood and it was a pay per car type of Trunksgiving celebration. 

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I do know that tonight is Taco Thursday. Well, to be fair, I’ve called it Mexican Monday and Taco Tuesday today (at one point Louie said, are you having a stroke?) so I will say that I know, with at least 37 percent certainty, that tonight is Taco Thursday. That’s probably far more than Congress knows, so I’ll consider it a win.

Random thoughts

All Kinds of Professional

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Well, hello there! It’s been a busy weekend, and I’m just now getting a moment to sit down and collect my thoughts.

There’s been a lot going on in my life lately, and most of it good. Louie (who has been going back to school since I’ve known him) got offered a full-time job the other day and he accepted. He starts in December. I am very excited, both for him and for us. He’s worked really hard to get where he is now, and I think the next chapter is going to be really interesting and even a bit fun.

Friday morning I had a few errands to run, and I ended up doing a few things at the bank that will be helpful for my violin teaching business. I felt like such an adult, having a long meeting with a bank associate. A couple of times she told me to check with my accountant, and that made me giggle, since my accountant is a computer program. I also got a flu shot and a library card (to check out books on my kindle, woo-hoo!) so it was just a full day of activity. I would like to say, I think it’s funny when you do errands in the morning and people often assume you have the day off. Why, sure, I have the day off, until 4 pm when I teach and then have rehearsal until 10 pm. So it’s kind of a half day, plus a couple hours of practicing! I think I’d think it was a half day of work if I worked from 8 to 5 too, as that gives your whole evening free Winking smile Maybe I have a problem.

I mostly worked through the weekend—teaching and a wedding on Saturday, and a double rehearsal day for Winter Opera yesterday. We did have a little fun on Saturday night and went to the Symphony and then out with another couple we ran into at the concert. The concert was pretty good, though sparsely attended. I think people who don’t regularly attend arts events are really missing out, especially here in St Louis. Then again, there are so many events that perhaps it’s hard to keep up.  On any given weekend I will have 2 to 3 concerts in mind that I know would be really interesting to attend, but often I don’t make it to any of them…I also get invites and see advertising for tons of great looking concerts on weekday evenings..there is just so much going on culturally that there is no excuse for people not to get out there and see it. Many events are free too. I guess seeing so many empty seats at the symphony (to me it seemed like a lot, maybe I’m wrong) made me think about what people do for entertainment. It can be hard to get off the couch sometimes, because watching TV on the couch is so easy and relaxing and comfortable, but I’m glad we went out Saturday night, and every time I attend a live performance I’m glad I went.

That’s all for now! Time to run, finish some laundry, grocery shop, practice, teach, and run a sectional with the orchestra at Washington University. Busy day and busy week ahead!

Random thoughts

Time’s a tickin’

I don’t think my title is totally grammatically correct…

I texted April earlier today that I feel like all I do is work. This month has been a lot of work, and running, and some hanging out with Louie, but mostly we just watch TV because we are too exhausted to do anything else, or it’s just too late anyway. I don’t even feel like I’m that busy, except when I’m trying to figure out when to get things done. I’m used to teaching 38 students and practicing 1-3 hours a day, and running, and doing mostly everything around the house because Louie is too busy (hopefully that is changing soon because I don’t actually do everything so lots of things aren’t getting done.)

But! So, I went for a run this morning, (20 minutes without walking) and what is with the weather? It’s still summer outside—it was 80 degrees by midday. Is this the future? Global warming? I don’t really care for it. I’m ready for those cooler temperatures to stay for awhile. I bought new purple running leggings that I really want to wear, but I can’t wear pants to exercise unless it’s near or below freezing.

For my opera class (taking a class at EdX on opera) I just listened to the recording of Ave Maria done by Alessandro Moreschi, a castrati born in 1858 and who made the recording in 1903. It made me sad on so many levels. What people did in order to make their voices like that. And then thinking about everybody who made the recording, and how they are all long dead…and what will happen to all of our videos and recordings from now? And that it was socially acceptable to have castrati, and now it absolutely isn’t, and that you can’t do that to a child who can’t make that decision…it’s fascinating, but tragic really. And who had the idea first, to do that to a person in order to keep their voice from changing??

I got to see my brother-in-law, Peter, this week. He was in town for a “job interview” (he’s a musician as well, so it was an audition, but it’s the same idea, only with more work, more money paid out of pocket, and well, more personal devastation afterwards.) I’m really looking forward to visiting Phoenix in a few weeks and seeing the whole family…my niece just had her first birthday. She’s getting so old, soon she will be a real person!

I’ve been battling a cold all week. I feel mostly okay, except I’ve got a slight cough, congestion, and just TIRED. I’ve been trying to rest but it’s hard, and I haven’t wanted to miss any paid work so I’ve been forging ahead. I do feel like this evening I’m starting to feel more like myself, but (sigh) between Louie and I we’ve been sick for nearly two weeks and I’m pretty much over it. I want to be back to normal and be able to sleep on my side or even better, my stomach! (I can’t breathe well enough yet, so it’s been back sleeping for DAYS.)

I helped out at a nearby high school with a little after school “audition prep”. I was really doing a favor for Eliana, but I had a great time. I’m thinking maybe that’s how I can “give back.” I always feel like I need to be volunteering, since that’s what people do, but I realized today that the best use of my skills would be to volunteer and occasionally help with a sectional or something for a school. There are plenty of benefits for me too, of course, from networking and recruiting, to simply feeling like I have skills to offer that are top of the line and invaluable…not second rate, not “not in the symphony” or “following direction from an orchestra director” but teaching the way I know how and teaching the students to be their best selves. I know I can’t let other people’s opinions bother me, but it’s just hard when you don’t feel respected and appreciated. Today I feel like I AM respected and appreciated.

And on that note. Dinner time! Tonight is a bag salad from Schnuck’s, roasted yellow squash with parmesan, and mushroom ravioli from Trader Joe’s. Yummy!

Running

Rock and Roll St Louis Half Marathon 2015

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My second half marathon in as many weeks! This morning was the Rock and Roll Half Marathon in St Louis. (Last week was the Go! Halloween Half Marathon.)

I ran a race the other year with a slight cold, but this morning I ran a race with MORE of a cold. I was nervous about it, and barely slept the night before, but when the clock read around 5 am I decided just to get up and start getting ready. I naturally got to the race too early but I listened to the news in the car and drank a little more coffee…and it’s always better to be early than late, in my opinion.

First off, it was really cold. Much colder than I’d hoped for, and luckily the night before I added a long sleeve jacket thing to my outfit. (I wore a hooded thick shirt sort of garment. I don’t even know how to describe it, because it’s not a jacket, but not a shirt either…) My car had FROST on it! I guess fall is finally here…

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Pretty chilly temperatures. Well, better cold than hot (I’m all about comparisons in this post, evidently) for running!

Rock and Roll races are well organized, in my experience. We had a corral start, which meant that they held each group back for 1-2 minutes to let the field ahead clear out a bit. It’s nice to be able to start running right away, and it only took around 20 minutes to cross the start line (I was in Corral 13).

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I look like a tired Rudolph. But it’s not a proper recap without showing numerous pictures, and not all selfies are created equal.

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I swear these shoes are blue. I did decided to wear my new running shoes and I have no regrets. But they are BLUE not white! It’s like “the dress” back a few months ago. Rock and Roll does their timing through a shoe thing—that’s the orange thing you see.

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Anyway, I’m not going to go into extreme detail about the race. It was pretty tough…I was exhausted and my nose was running pretty steadily…(LOTS of snot rockets because I couldn’t have carried enough tissue to deal with it…gross I know but what can you do? I always looked around first…which slowed me down a bit.) I set my timer to 5/1 intervals and kept to them all the way except the first walk interval I skipped and then again skipped all walk breaks after mile 12.

It took awhile to warm up—my feet and hands and legs were cold! But after a couple of miles I started feeling good, and then after another couple I started hurting, but I pushed on. The course was a lot more fun than the week before and I enjoyed all the neighborhoods. It was a loop rather than more of an out-and-back which is easier mentally for me. The course was decently crowded throughout, which was nice except at the later water station where nearly everybody seemed to stop and walk and then keep walking. The end was the same—once I saw mile 12 I decided to keep running no matter how lousy I felt. Most of the people around me were just walking which made me almost feel silly as I passed everybody and pushed as fast as I could towards the finish.

My goal was to beat last week’s time, but I didn’t. My second goal was to be under 3 hours and I’m glad I pushed at the end because I made it! I started the race slow because I didn’t know how I’d feel (both from being sick and from running last weekend). Maybe I left too much in the tank, but I think overall my pacing worked for where I am in my running. I was spent by the time I crossed the finish line, and had trouble getting some of the snacks. I did miss having a roll or bagel after the race—it was all pretzels/chips/bars/bananas, and I just love a nice soft roll or pretzel or bagel.

2:59:13! Oddly my 5k and 10k times didn’t register, so I can’t truly tell how my pacing was…(runkeeper is too inaccurate to help, does anybody else have that problem? seriously, it’s terribly inaccurate) but I definitely stepped up my pace from the 10 mile pace to the end. I’d love to see how many people I passed in the last mile!  Anyway.

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I took my after race pictures in the parking lot…I just kept walking after I finished because I was worried if I stopped to set things down (water, snacks) that I wouldn’t want to start walking again! We will see how sore I feel tomorrow, but I feel pretty good right now, only a little achy, and I definitely think the new shoes helped.

Did you run the race? Do you use runkeeper? Or were you reading this hoping I’d be writing about cats instead? Don’t worry, watch this space!

Random thoughts, Running

Getting ready to Rock and Roll

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This weekend I’m running my…fourth (?) Rock and Roll Event. It’s the St Louis Rock and Roll Half Marathon, and I am probably a little crazy, but the memory of last weekend’s pain is already starting to fade…so…I’ll be there!

Tomorrow I’ll hit up the expo. RNR does a good job with the expo, or at least they have in the past. I’ve only run the St Louis race once and that was the first year. I’ve run the one in Phoenix twice and LOVE that race—it’s just so giant and the energy is great. Interesting fact: my half PR (personal record) is from the St Louis RNR Half a few years ago. I won’t be setting any new records on Sunday but I am totally okay with that. I was so happy after last week’s race and that is enough for me right now.

I went for a run in my new running shoes this morning. They felt fantastic, so I think I won’t be out of line running in them this weekend. “They” say don’t wear anything new on race day, but the shoes aren’t new. 1) I already ran in them and 2) They are the exact same model I’ve been running in for around two years now.

Okay, non-running talk…hmmm…well, there’s teaching. I’ve been doing lots of teaching, as usual. LOTS of repetition and patience (I don’t know that I agree that patience is controlled frustration, as some say…I think that patience means knowing that things that many might find annoying are important and necessary steps and so I don’t get bothered) and lots of trying to prepare kids for the recital in November. It’s still over a month away but that means that NOW is the time to be really putting in the work. I don’t know how other teachers do it, but I think of one month away as the time to really be decided on what piece (or pieces) to play and be polishing the piece. It’s not the time to be still learning anything, at least not for the younger and less experienced performers, because performing is hard enough without having to perform something you aren’t 100 percent comfortable playing by yourself!

Louie and I had to skip Taco Thursday this week due to other commitments and I won’t pretend I wasn’t disappointed. It looks like we’ll be having Taco Friday though, so that’s a good compromise. I figure that mexican food is good carb loading two nights pre-race. I don’t think that it would be that great the night before…especially not beans or anything spicy! Louie has been having a really stressful semester this fall, and it’s been hard on me as well, feeling like I have to pick up some of the slack. Between that and dealing with sick pets, I’ve been a little overly stressed the past few weeks, but I’m hoping that soon things will turn around. We have some traveling ahead of us for a wedding and some family events, so that will at least put some variety into the daily grind.

Being a musician isn’t all fun and games…there’s a lot that just feels like work and like each day of the week is like the same day a week prior, and that nothing ever changes! I suppose that’s how most people feel with their jobs, but people often say “inspirational” things like “If you do what you love, you won’t work a day in your life” or other such BS things, that are obviously written by somebody who hasn’t turned their passion into work. Or maybe it’s that my true passion is for performing, but all the work that goes into THAT, and all the teaching that is required in order to have the money and time to be able to practice in order to perform at a high level…all of that isn’t totally my passion…and therefore I’m just working my butt off! I do LIKE teaching, and some days I have a great time, and some students are simply delightful, and other days it’s like pulling teeth and I just dread it (sorry students, it’s not personal, it’s just that teaching is HARD WORK and exhausting sometimes!) I do a lot of unpaid work and sometimes I wonder if I should have just done something easier! But eh, I kind of love what I do and I certainly don’t intend to change much about it other than trying to feel more secure, and make more meaningful performance opportunities and more opportunities for my students. And maybe write more, and try to write better…

Okay, time to get to work: I’m taking an EdX course on Italian Opera and I’m only part way through watching the Marriage of Figaro. I think taking online courses can be a fun way to improve yourself (is it super nerdy that I think learning is fun? Smile) and I’m eager to learn more about opera—I have played a good number of operas over the years but I’ve really only seen a select few!