All posts by hannahviolin

I am a violinist. I also enjoy running, working out, reading, and hanging with my friends and cat.
Deep Thoughts

Work-life balance?

I feel like this year has been the busiest ever. That’s probably not true, but it’s certainly been a busier year than most in St Louis. Possibly all. I moved here in 2008 and since I’m a freelancer, it does take time to build up work and connections. I’m finally feeling like I’m at a great point here (means it’s probably time to move, hahahaha!) where the phone keeps ringing (email really, please email as it’s just so much easier to respond and give information for anything!) for students, gigs keep coming, and great chamber music opportunities abound. And I don’t like to say no, especially when money or potential musical satisfaction are at stake, so that means, busy, busy!

Right now I’m preparing for another performance of the Irish Quartet on Saturday (after two weddings I booked), the Perseid Quartet concert this Sunday, a concert with the Metropolitan Orchestra (a new-to-me group that I considered linking to but has an auto-play website and I just couldn’t…) on the following Sunday, and a neat set of concerts with the Illumine Ensemble called “Play with your food.” I have a couple other random things and one of my two student recitals…before we go to Italy. I think it’s safe to say that the time will fly by?

People often talk about a work-life balance. Often it’s in regards to women with children (I guess men don’t care, or at least that’s the impression I get from most media) but I think it definitely fits for people without children too. We have to balance work with our relationships—friends, family, partners. It can be tough. I haven’t had real issues with the partner side, and my family lives far away and I do visit some (I should do better), but the friends can be tough! I always wish I saw my friends more often, but it’s hard to do it with work—both theirs and mine.  And it’s always easy to think, oh, after this activity, or that activity is done, I’ll have more time. Occasionally that’s true (giant exam, huge project, audition, solo recital), but other times after a time-sucking activity is done another pops up to take its place. Fellow freelance musicians (or other adults!), how do you balance work and play? Aside from the obvious, work with your friends, which I also do.

Well, I’m off to practice. I was just typing this while drinking coffee. I’d thought to myself, I used to blog a lot more, and that was fun. Why not two days in a row? Why not indeed? And now practicing, a run (weather permitting) and teaching await, with possibly Mexican-themed celebrations at the end of the evening since Louie has a big test.

Cat, Italy, Travel

Good Things Happening

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The big news: I am going with Louie’s family on a trip to Italy in May. I am so excited! We will be going to Rome for sure and the rest is TBD. I’m so thrilled to be going to Europe again and feel so lucky!

Until then, life is crazy as usual. Thursday my quartet played a concert at the Kemper Art Museum at Washington University. I had been really stressed out about it because we were playing about 7 pieces by student composers and they ranged from difficult to exceedingly difficult. We also played Shostakovich’s String Quartet no. 8 (again) after all of that. The concert ended up feeling like it went really well, and the crowd was appreciative.

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As you can see it was a really neat space to play in, and we had a full house.

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The less good thing happening is that our white cat, Chloe, has been diagnosed with diabetes. Poor kitty. She has to have twice daily insulin injections, which has been a challenge. I’m sure it will become part of the regular routine (wake up, get attacked by loads of overly hungry animals who were sure they were going to die, feed animals, give Chloe a shot?) but it’s been one more added stress. She doesn’t seem to mind the shots other than an initial discomfort, and I’m sure that she must be feeling better than ever with the medicine!

So I’ve been doing an instagram challenge, taking/posting one photo a day. I’d read that it makes people become better photographers, or that it will change your life. Well, I’ve definitely become a worse photographer, because sometimes I’m at the end of the day and realize, oh no, I didn’t take a picture yet! Plus the added stress…did I get a picture today? Does stealing one from somebody’s facebook count? I guess I’m learning something about myself (that I mostly like to take pictures of my food and cats) (or that I’m pretty boring) and it’s a good challenge. I imagine I’ll look back on the year and feel super accomplished.

I did finally recover from my cold (look at me, following up on things) though I have had low-grade congestion all week. I’m thinking that it is allergies at this point: I feel mostly good, except a little tired still, but that gets better each day. This weekend I was able to do a fair amount of relaxing and sleep in one day. I’ve got some really fun performances coming up and so much to do before Italy, but I’m walking around in disbelief (something awesome happening to me!) and with lists in my head—I have been trying to stay on top of things by using my to-do list on my phone a lot, plus I totally made a packing list for Italy. I want to fit everything in my smaller suitcase and not overpack for once in my life, but I also don’t want to miss anything. And generally I don’t mind overpacking—for instance, if I’m flying to a destination where I will be picked up from the airport in a car, and then spend the whole time somewhere, I’d actually rather have brought too many clothes than not enough. I’ve often been in Phoenix and regretted not bringing more clothes or shoes. But this is different because it’s international travel, it’s possibly five people squeezing into a car with five suitcases, and that means to pack as light as possible.

Did I mention Rome?

I was there in the summer of 2001 for a couple of days. It was on a tour of Italy with the Erie Youth Symphony (speaking of lucky and amazing things happening to me—I just got asked to go along to fill out the section!). I just found these photos online at Snapfish and wondered at first why my albums only had 24 pictures in them…haha! That was back when photos cost money to see. I’m lucky I have them online! I remember trying to figure out how many rolls of film to bring along. What a wonderful trip though. I wish I’d been a blogger then or kept a better journal so I could reminisce more…well, things have changed now! You know you’ll be hearing all about Italy after it happens!

childhood

Happy Easter!

Since I’m just lounging on the couch, I thought I’d look through some of the old photos my mom put online a few years ago and find something good from Easter. I think this fits the bill!

That’s me and my brother Jesse. I recognize the blue bunny in the bucket—I had that well into adolescence! Don’t ask why I’m squatting, I don’t want to know either. Yes, we used to be blonde, and yes, my brother looks like a child model in this picture.

Here’s another good one. Me, Leslie, Jesse, and my Grandma on my Mom’s side. I’m clearly over the picture taking, Leslie looks possessed, Jesse is trying to steal that fish thing (which I recall had money in it to give to the hungry) from Grandma, and it features our fantastic knee socks and hand woven baskets. My basket looks pretty bad too—I was never good at DIY.

Here’s another from seems to be that same day. Leslie seems to have been exorcised, and we also include my mom and my grandpa. I guess my dad was the photo taker!

I can’t say for sure but I wouldn’t be surprised if this were from Easter another year. Usually pictures were from some holiday! Ah, the days when it cost money to take pictures…

The past few days have been a blur of nothingness. I’ve done a few gigs/rehearsals, but mostly just been a blob on the couch. I hate it, but I just don’t have the energy for anything else! The best part is that I KNOW this is just a bad cold and it’ll pass and then I’ll get back to regular life. I’ve also read a few books which has been nice, but this wasn’t how I planned to spend my weekend. I planned to do a lot of practicing, some work, some fun stuff—relaxing AND socializing. I had to cancel an Easter Potluck I was invited to because I’m just too gross and miserable 🙁 I’m really just whining. I’ll be just fine.

I haven’t had any Easter Candy this year though. My favorite are the Reese’s Peanut Butter Eggs. I did get some candy at Trader Joe’s the other day: Dark Chocolate Peanut Butter Salted Caramel Truffles. I had one last night: the verdict is GOOD but a bit of too many flavors all together. That’s what I get for being greedy. Don’t worry, I will manage to finish the bag eventually…it’ll be a bit of a hardship but I can do it 😉

What’s your favorite Easter Candy? Do you have any pictures of your pets dressed up in funny seasonal costumes? (This isn’t something I have, but I certainly wish I did—photoshop perhaps?)

Random thoughts

Rockin’ Friday Night!

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So yeah. Naturally after all of that I ended up getting a cold. I think I haven’t had one really since October, so I was probably due. Sigh. You don’t get sick days when you’re self employed…well you DO but they cost you. 

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I figure how I feel like right now is how cats feel all the time: tired, cranky, and in need of a nap. I also feel fuzzy, though not in the same way.

I got home from a Good Friday Concert early this afternoon and Louie asked me if I was going to lie on the couch and watch Gilmore Girls all afternoon. <—-winning!

I wanted to, but decided I’d better take advantage of my “sick day” to catch up on my deposits, pay some bills, and finish my taxes. So YES all my taxes are done, and checks are in the envelopes ready to be mailed. Related: why can’t we pay all of our taxes electronically yet? Then again, the website I’m trying to use to pay my federal estimated taxes has been down for me all afternoon, so maybe I’ll end up mailing that one in too. I realize this is a fascinating paragraph, but taxes are serious business, and I’m glad to have all that work behind me until next year.

I haven’t entirely been a homebody lately, but mostly. Last Friday Louie and I went to a movie, Wild Tales, and had dinner beforehand at a hole in the wall Korean restaurant on the Loop called U-City Grill. The whole restaurant has about ten seats and there was one man working behind the counter. There wasn’t any wasted time for politeness—for instance, while another customer was ordering the man working actually left the room—when he returned, the customer continued his order as if nothing had happened. So don’t expect to be coddled, but the food was simple, quick, cheap, and delicious. I had the bibimbap and would get it again. After dinner we had time to kill so we enjoyed a beer at Blueberry Hill. Until a few years ago I never went to the Loop but lately I’ve gone so much—there are so many great restaurants there, and more to try…if I ever get over this cold…(dramatic sigh)…

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There’s the Perseid Quartet playing at the Ethical Society last weekend. It must have been during the slow movement of the Borodin Quartet since I was resting. We have a busy week ahead getting ready for a concert at the Kemper Art Museum on Thursday. The good thing about being sick right now is that I should be better soon and have this cold behind me. The bad thing is that I haven’t felt like practicing, but luckily I put in some good hours recently. I find the key to being prepare is to learn my music ahead of time rather than stress over it at the last minute. Then again, consistent practice helps too.

Well, I keep thinking I’ll get inspired to write something more interesting, but that just isn’t happening. I’ll blame the cold medicine…or the Parks and Rec marathon I have going on right now.

Teaching

Who else feels exhausted and run down?

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Every since getting back from Spring Break I’ve been running myself ragged. I worked straight through the weekend with teaching, rehearsals, practicing, and performances, and this morning was the first time I was able to relax a little. In fact, more than a little since I woke up aching all over from yesterday’s 13 hour day (and 6 plus hours of playing, yikes!) so I’ve just done some paperwork (I count emailing, bill paying, check depositing, phone call returning all as paperwork as I don’t know how else to really explain it?), went for a little run (BEAUTIFUL weather!) and now I’m considering what I want for lunch before it’s time for “only” six hours of teaching.

It’s been a mess this month and a bit next month too with performances. It’s hard teaching so many students while trying to maintain a performing career too, because that means evening rehearsals on occasion, and lately that “on occasion” has been more often than I like, but I am playing so many fun concerts too, so it’s just a crazy time. I’ve been teaching 6 days a week, and some weeks ahead might be 7, just to keep up. On the bright side, I’ve gotten my taxes filed and paid, and my bank account is very happy even though my mind and body are less so. I have 5 performances in April, and 3 right at the beginning of May, so next month doesn’t really let up, though I have less evening responsibilities, luckily.

Here’s something that delighted and frightened me the other day: the mother of one of my students told me that my student wanted to be “just like me”. To be a teacher and play violin with different groups and play concerts. I was completely flattered and honored, and terrified that it’s a challenging life! But mostly I was touched that I seem like somebody that a middle school student wants to be like. I had a student earlier in the month tell me that I was a very nice but really picky teacher. I try to make violin FUN first off, because it is, but I also try to make sure they are doing their best and playing things properly with good technique. Practicing and learning violin is hard, honestly, but music is fun. It’s a challenge to insist that students are doing things properly without taking away the joy they have! Sometimes I fail and land more on the side of “fun” with some of them, and with others I’ll land more on the side of “tedious”, but I do try to strike the appropriate balance with each student. (Emphasis on try! But that’s all we can do, right!)

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I don’t feel like uploading pictures from my phone today, so here’s an older one before Spring Break. Imagine that’s the world’s biggest suitcase 😉

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And here’s a pile of animals. Who can even tell what’s going on??

Random thoughts

March Madness

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I’m copying the title from my friend Eliana, who wrote a post about Viola March Madness. March and April are busy times—in fact, March is flying by so quickly I almost feel like I’ve missed it. The other odd thing is that I keep thinking the next month is August. At least three times in the past few days I’ve said August when I meant to say April. I don’t know what that means—am I having a nervous breakdown or early-onset dementia?

So, Spring Break was fun, though not as relaxing as one might hope. I did read several books, including Station Eleven which I absolutely loved and can’t stop thinking about.

I had lots of baby time!

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She’s trapped and I won’t let go.

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Overindulged and then passed out.

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Leslie and I started trying to teach her that these were fake, plastic keys, and that if she had REAL keys she shouldn’t put them in her mouth.

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She enjoyed swinging quite a bit!

Overall I’m so glad I got to visit for a week. She is my first niece and is 5 months old now. It was also one of the best weather weeks in Phoenix that I’ve ever experienced! It did rain one day, but otherwise was really nice and warm, even cool at night, and only one day felt too hot! By the way, I am not in the large group of people who think that the weather is Phoenix is amazing all the time. On the plane ride home I overheard people behind me talking about how the weather is so great, and it’s a dry heat, and up to 105 it’s just amazing. Which may or may not be true, but how many days per year are over 105?  That being said, my sister and her husband are doing really well and have a really great house in a walkable neighborhood that is close to downtown, which is pretty much exactly what I love too.

So after Spring Break ended, I took a very early flight home and hit the ground running. I’ve been teaching a ton, had several rehearsals and the weekend is full of more of the same. On Sunday my quartet (Perseid Quartet) is playing at the Ethical Society for their morning service.  One of the challenging things our quartet has been doing lately is learning some pieces that composition students at Washington University wrote. We had an adventurous rehearsal yesterday reading through the pieces. Sometimes music notation is so challenging. I think of how it would be looking at a Brahms Quartet for the first time…without the benefit of hundreds of recordings, years of study and listening. I guess that’s part of why people love new music—the challenge…and also being able to play something without hundreds of years of history telling you how you aren’t playing it well enough. You know me and my constant fear of not being good enough (based on years of being told that, but that’s hardly an excuse!)

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I found this picture on facebook from a concert I played the other week. My hair looks great from the back, and I’d like all my students to notice how my violin is over my shoulder, parallel to the floor, my wrist in straight, my thumb is relaxed, and my bow is also straight, though it’s hard to see since it is disappearing into the light. I had one of those teaching weeks where I felt that everything I asked my students to do was ignored and they just kept playing exactly how they wanted to. Ranging from requests to check their bowhold before they started, to play closer to the bridge, to watch their bow, and even in some cases, to play a different piece than the one they were doing. Maybe I need to be meaner?

I’m looking forward to the weekend. I have a few things I need to accomplish today, but then the evening is free for recreation (though Louie is sick, so it’s possible the evening will be just relaxing in front of the television—currently we are watching The Americans, on a Dr. Who hiatus), and tomorrow evening is free as well! I’d love to go out to dinner and maybe to a concert or a movie. Suggestions?